I have been urged to date. To ‘get out into the game’. To ‘get back up on that horse’… so to speak. So, I’m dating. I have no idea what I’m doing. I don’t know what I’m looking for, but what I do know is that it’s fun most of the time. I enjoy meeting people. Seems I have to be extra clear on what I want though. What do I want? Do I want anything? Do I just want a quick fuck? A relationship? I think I’m scared of actual commitment. I don’t need that right now I don’t think. I just want to have fun.
Yeah, that’s what I want. I want to have fun. “Where do you see this going with us?” is kind of a deal breaker for me, I think. Don’t plan anything. Just go with it. Shit, just relax. Enjoy the moment. Who cares where this is going?
I’m trying out this Tinder thing. So far, I’ve had a couple fun dates, and some really bad ones. I guess you get the bad with the good, eh? I’m sure I’ll blog about anything monumental if anything does ‘go anywhere’, but I doubt it.
You know, the scared of commitment thing? I think I’m too damaged for a real relationship. But whatever, it’s about getting out of my comfort zone, right? I need to stop hiding. And this is part of the healing… right?
So… here… we… GO!