Tag Archives: gay marriage

Success Story

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Since I haven’t posted in over a week, I wanted to start out with a few random thoughts of the day. First of all, I was looking at my all time top search phrase, and the number 1 top search phrase was ‘sexwoman’. 40 views were made from this phrase. The next top phrase was ‘gay marriage’ with 8 views. Wow… I didn’t know I sexualized my blog so much, but yay for me, I guess!

Secondly, I just passed 2,000 views on my blog. Again, yay me! I started my blog in February, and haven’t tried to boost my traffic at all. This is an informative blog that I have shared with my facebook account, and to gain support in my journey with my new business and my mental illness. I’m quite proud to say I think I have helped people realize what is going on in my head, and helped them understand a bit more about being bipolar.

IMG_1636Thirdly, I have a success story to share. Napoleon and I have been working on long-distance stays and distraction/impulse control training. We have implemented a lot more ‘rest time’ into his schedule, and done 30 minutes of vigorous training in one session, and then plenty of down time afterwards. I have noticed such a difference, that sometimes I think I have a whole new dog!

Over the Memorial Day weekend, Napoleon had an opportunity to train around A LOT of distractions. I had my family come over, and they normally love to give him attention. We practiced a long-distance down-stay while I was in the kitchen making lunch, as my 3year old niece was running around playing and screaming. We were also babysitting a puppy, and my dad had the puppy on a leash so she wouldn’t get away and run around the house. So, my dog had to down-stay while I was making food ( a HUGE challenge for him is impulse control around food), a loud child, a puppy, and having new people in the house.

What was our result?! SUCCESS!! He stayed in a down for about 15 minutes around all the distractions. I then broke his stay with a recall, and then put him closer to the distractions and tried again. The puppy got away from my dad and wanted to play with Napoleon. He got up after about 5 minutes of abuse from this mouthy poodle/pointer mix. Then, I put him back in a stay in the hallway for about 10 minutes and then kenneled him so he could learn everything we practiced. He did AWESOME! I was so proud! This was a huge milestone for him. Usually, when there are people around, food, and the excitement levels are high, he really struggles, and my anxiety levels sky rocket. When I’m anxious, it is not the time to train. He really helped me that day because he was completely awesome the entire time.

Gay Marriage

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Marriage-is-about-LOVE-gay-marriage-26811416-500-375Gay. Marriage. Depression. Sex.

A few things in my life. I am gay (well, bisexual to be technical). I am married, to a man. Just happened that way. I wasn’t particularly looking for a man, I could have ended up with a woman. But it just ended up that way. That’s ok, too. Depression, well, I’ve talked about that one before. And Sex. I LOVE sex. Who doesn’t?

Anyway, gay marriage. Let’s put those together.  GAY MARRIAGE. In my mind, this is a beautiful thing. 2 people meeting, finding love, and starting a life together.  To some, it’s repulsive. Why? Because it’s so misunderstood, religion, ignorance, lack of education, change, something new…

Many reasons.

Why do I see gay marriage this way? Because 1) I’m gay. 2) I think if you have to fight for something, you appreciate it more. You are fighting against society. You have to really FIGHT and take abuse in order to continue being yourself and loving someone.

Family. GAY MARRIAGES having CHILDREN together. A man and a man biologically cannot have child together.  A woman and a woman biologically cannot have a child together. Does this mean they can’t have children? No! There are other ways to have a baby. And these ways are beautiful.  These people have to work so hard for what they want in life.  Again, this is wonderful, and almost brings tears to my eyes to see something so beautiful.

Depression. Many people already suffer from depression, but imagine this: A gay man is married to a woman, and has a couple of kids. Every day, he has to lie to himself. Force himself to sleep with someone who he doesn’t find attractive, and in some cases – finds disgusting. Sexually, he is not satisfied by her. Physically, he is missing a part of himself. Is this right? In my mind, no. He is wasting his life, pretending to be someone he is not. So, depression sets in. Does he leave his family to be himself? Does he stay and live out a life that is a lie?

Sex. Woman on woman, man on man, woman and man. What is right? Why? We are in a civilization where people can BE HAPPY.  People get uncomfortable when we talk about gay sex. Why? Picture: A woman and a man having sex. Great, right? Now a woman on a woman:  Men and women alike seem to be fine with this as well. Now, a man and a man having sex: For me, I think it’s fine too – no change in feelings. For some people, this is unacceptable, and makes them cringe. Why?  To be, again, all sex is beautiful.

Discrimination.samesexmarriage

It’s an ugly word with many meanings. Let’s stay on topic and talk about gay marriage. The entire gay community has been discriminated against for as long as there were open gays in the world. Now, why? I have a theory. I see my gay friends, myself included, and I see different personalities. I think society has a problem with the more flamboyant gays. Ones that like to advertise themselves, as well as being gay. They like to talk about gay sex in front of straight people to get a rise out of them. They like to say ‘spread awareness’. But, would any other combination of a couple talk about their bedroom life so openly? Some would, of course. But, because the gay community has to fight so hard for what they want, it sometimes seems like they try too hard. Good intentions, gone bad, I think.

I like talking about sex just as much as anyone, and will openly answer any questions anyone has. Maybe not everyone would do that, but I don’t advertise my bedroom life, nor would I think my partners would appreciate that. Since I am married, I only have one sex partner, but that wasn’t so in the past. And I can honestly say, I don’t think any of them would like me talking what we have done in the past without their permission, or unless they were there.

As a close to this thought I had today, I want to point out, there are bad eggs in every genre of people. Just because someone is gay doesn’t mean they are a bad person, or a bad mom/dad. It doesn’t mean they are going to hurt someone or not do well in school. It doesn’t mean they can’t love. And it doesn’t mean they can’t be happy. It means they are different. And as a society, I hope we grow to accept all differences in this world.

STOP THE BULLYING! STOP THE HATE! STOP THE DISCRIMINATION. We all want to be loved and acknowledged. And here’s a funny video as thanks for reading my thoughts today.